Moving on.....

I wish he knew I am thinking about him and that last night I couldn’t sleep.

Only if he knew that even now I am unable to concentrate.

I miss his phone calls. Does he still have my number? I wish a phone would ring and see that it’s him calling, I wouldn’t wait for the second ring to pick the phone up. “How are you doing today?” I expect he would ask.

Would he whisper in my ears again “I love you” when he sees me? Does he miss my hugs; I remember the last hug as just yesterday.

I try to focus and still memories disturb me and take me in wash room to scream and refresh.  Trying to sleep but he gets in the way to wake me up. Trying to let him go but can’t get him off for a second.

I never thought I would fall for someone like you. Ooh how quickly and easily I failed myself. I do not know how you did it but what I know is that I was much fooled and here a fool wanting to bring back the time. I wish I had never met you, I wish I never spent time with you, I wish time would go back and be strangers to each other. I regret my ears that listened to your sweet words that changed me within a second. Easily believed that what you said was you. “I love you.” repeated it many times and now unable to hate you. Trying to forget but your everything finds me in my dream.

As hurting as a piercing sword is my heart, no wonder I need to get rid of him. I thought I had found the right guy, was ready to bear and fight everything against but you did not give me the chance.  Put you in special sit in my heart but found that am just a young lady you met on the road like a bean in the beans dish. “If you’re giving your best to someone and it’s not good enough for them, you’re giving your best to the wrong person.” My friend always tells me.

May be I was wrong but I was serious. Yes, I fallen on the ground thinking it was a mat. But still I believe my mat is, and is waiting for such a beautiful lady as I am. “She is the best thing that ever been mine” he will be telling all his friends. He will love me, He will care about me, He will cherish and respect me, he will never dare taking me for granted, he will make me forget you. I can’t believe He is on his way to me, I will follow him the rest of my life and only death will separate us. I miss him before I know him, and I miss the moments we will treasure together. For sure the second house will be of more glory than the first one for the first one was my hands building but the second will be God’s hand building it (Haggai 2:9).